two weeks later

I have decided to take some small action in the direction of my true writer self. Last week, I saw an ad for the Banff Centre for Arts Writing program – a one-week writer’s workshop. My boss told me about this last spring and a friend of mine also mentioned it to me in the summer. Last month, a third friend said that another friend of hers who is in the middle of writing her second book, went to a retreat and found it incredibly helpful. Seems like a number of “signs” to me.

I am to write a paragraph on my current writing project, a history of my writing achievements and provide less than 20 pages of what I would want to work on. This has given me a goal. There are two sessions: one spring, one fall. I am applying for both. I am taking my writer-self seriously. I am saying, “Yes, I am a writer and I want to publish. Yes, I want to study the craft of writing and also be sympathetic to my own creative process. Yes, I want some guidance in how to achieve this goal.”

Interetestingly, I have had to choose from the novel exactly what I want to send. I have been playing with various “voices” and some chapters I feel are stronger then the others. The other thing here is that I have never sent “selections” of something and I wonder if those on the other end will “get it” if I only send a little bit. It is probably more about the quality of the writing rather than the quantity.

I have also decided to apply for that LMM position. I am sure there are many more qualified than I, but I have studied her in my way and I have a couple of projects in mind that I really would like to do at some juncture. To deny that would be wrong.

I am afraid that I will fail. I ponder what will happen to my writer-self if I do fail.

All I do know, is that I spent 80% of my time writing this weekend and I could hear that distant hum in my soul that said, “YES!”


About Melanie J. Fishbane

MAUD, my YA novel based on the teen life of author L.M. Montgomery will be published by Penguin Random House on April 25, 2017. I hold an MFA in Writing for Children and Young Adults from the Vermont College of Fine Arts. Here I talk about my writing process, things I love, and creative people who inspire me.
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